Fully Sick, Bro!


“Cure your ills with these here pills,
As easy as can be.
With my prescription in your hand,
You’ll soon be fit as me!”
The Doctor, smiling, showed me out
And took me by the hand.
His Secretary, smiling too,
Then charged me seven grand!

I hastened to the Pharmacy,
They welcomed me right in.
And when they saw my list of pills,
They wore a hearty grin!
“These pills aren’t on the PBS,
So sad, you’ll have to pay!”
I grabbed my pills and paid the bill,
Still shaking with dismay.

I found my way to Medicare
And settled in a chair.
The crowd of people waiting there
Near drove me to despair.
When my turn came, they shook their heads
And said it’s just the rule:
The scheduled fee is very small,
The refund’s minuscule!

Thankfully, the pills did help,
I’m working overtime.
When I was sick, the bills I paid
Were really quite a crime!
So when someone you know’s taken ill
And turns a little green,
And says, “I can’t afford to be sick!”
You’ll know just what they mean!

Stephen Tomkins
15 November 2014



We fall asleep and then wake up –
There’s nothing new in that.
It’s where we go when somewhere else
That’s worth a little chat.

It seems that slumber sets us free,
Just how we’ll never know.
Our spirits wander far and wide
To stage their nightly show.

We find ourselves as Presidents,
As tyrants and as Kings,
As heroes and as fugitives,
And a thousand other things.

We fall asleep, we fall in love,
We fall off mighty cliffs.
We save the day, we play guitar,
Composing catchy riffs.

And all the while, we stay at home,
But nothing ever changes;
While round the globe and into space
Our spirit freely ranges.

I like to think, when life is done,
And night becomes eternal,
I’ll find myself still free to roam,
Released from chains nocturnal.

Stephen Tomkins
20 October 2014



There was a girl I used to know,
She, past my desk, would to and fro,
Delivering mail and other things,
A whiff of perfume, I’d have wings!

Infatuation ruled my life
And soon I found myself in strife.
Distracted from my work was I
As back and forth she’d catch my eye.

One day I took my chances, and
With racing heart and trembling hand,
Caught her attention as she passed
And asked her out: she smiled and laughed.

That night I picked her up at eight
On what, I hoped, was our first date.
She said she couldn’t stay too long:
There was a sale on heels.com!

I should have seen the warning signs:
Her interests lay in shoe designs!
She loved her pumps, I now can see,
And leather boots much more than me.

Aghast, I finally understood:
I’d lost her heart to clogs of wood!
So happy did she seem that I
Could only smile and say goodbye.

Stephen Tomkins
2 April 2015

PS. Before I left unnoticed, I left her a note that said:

“I wish you and your shoes many happy years together”.


Let’s Be Friends


I say one thing and mean another,
Treat you like my long-lost brother.
And all the while, within my mind,
I hope, in you, that I will find
Someone to use for my own ends.
Or what’s the use of being friends?

I play the game so very well
That all the while you’d never tell;
Though one fine day you might just twig
And see that I’m a selfish pig.
Around the world, the people using,
With my tactics quite bemusing.

Gaining wealth by lies and stealth,
I fail to see I’ve sold my self.
Now in luxury’s lap I’m sitting
While a life I’m counterfeiting.
Alone I am and unfulfilled.
For company, by hour I’m billed.

Stephen Tomkins
2 March 2015